Sleuth 17/09/2010

Sleuth is a sideways glance at the city every week. We give £25 for every story/rumour and piece of absurdity you find for us to print. We ask for the money back if any legal action follows.

Sleuth as fashion king
Sleuth was in the Armani store at their breakfast press launch on Thursday. Sleuth was asked whether he was the fashion editor of Manchester Confidential. When he’d stopped laughing he explained that Lynda Moyo, the Body Confidential and therefore fashion editor, was at New York Fashion Week so he was just here to give Confidential some presence.

Funny how the words New York elicit immediate respect. Sleuth watched as the Armani lady looked him up and down and thought, ‘Thank the Lord for that, there’s hope for Confidential’s fashion pages after all’.

Lynda Moyo as fashion queen
Moyo, our Body Confidential editor, has been the cause of suspicion in the office. How had she managed to get Gordo to fork out for a trip to New York Fashion Week and was she perhaps just using it as a front for all expenses paid tourism? Seems not.

This is our queen of fashion appearing in Vogue sat next to Confidential friend Casey Gillespie of the Big Apple’s Zink magazine. Apparently white coats are very ‘on-trend’. Click here

Fame is a not being recognised
Sleuth attended the forty third re-opening of Living Room last week. It was short dress paradise. People were so bronzed that Sleuth felt he’d been kept in a cupboard all his life and denied natural light. At one point Sleuth was stood outside talking to one of the eight or so paparazzi. Suddenly the snapper pack lurched into intense activity.

The Manc pap stopped talking mid-conversation and ran to join it. The object of the frenzy were two young ladies in short dresses. “Who are they?” Sleuth asked catching him up. “No idea,” he said, “but everyone else is taking pictures.”

Becomeawag.com
It’s been wall-to-wall WAGS this week. In the wake of Rooneygate, the tabloids went into overdrive and the Observer even got in on the act, sending a hack to Panacea in Manchester to observe the Friday night mating rituals of the locals.

Apart from smutty headlines, there has been another bi-product. The lid has been lifted on the fact that becoming the significant other of a footballer is actually a career choice for some young ladies these days. A new website, becomeawag.com, links up wannabe Coleen’s with professional footballers.

Unbelievable but true. Sleuth talked to the site’s founder, Daniel Hall, this week and discovered that he’d signed 20 girls from Manchester so far. Come on ladies, you’re better than that, surely? Although as Old Granny Sleuth to say where there’s muck, there’s brass. An old phrase that Mr Rooney seems to have taken to heart.

Old friends get Sleuth gushy
Sleuth was at a recent Castlefield meeting for local residents, businesses and Sleuth. Dimitri, the eponymous owner of the famed Greek taverna at the Liverpool Road/Deansgate junction was there. He was sat next to his best mate Mike Harding, comedian, aesthete and gentleman of good taste. They both live in Castlefield. At the end of the meeting Dimitri said to Mike: “Right, where should we go for a drink, Dimitris I suppose?” “No,” quipped Mike, “I’ve been there, it’s crap.” They both doubled up with laughter and disappeared into the evening. Sleuth got all mushy inside about how sweet it was.

Castlefield blossoms online and in the real world
Good news from Castlefield as well. The www.ourcastlefield.co.uk website is up and running. Any interested people can take a look at the site, add comments, send in pics and contribute articles as well as find out about events happening down there and all the practical stuff about services. Also keep your eyes peeled by the Roman wall near the Castlefield Arena: next week the area sees a substantial resident maintained and managed planting scheme go in. It’ll look good during winter and autumn and beautiful by spring.

Well hung artist
Sleuth got a mysterious text this week. It was from Manchester University Press’s fine Mr Frost and it read: “Having lunch with Dave Gledhill at City Inn. We’re looking at how well hung he is.” Bit much for 1pm on a Wednesday thought Sleuth. Then he realised Gledhill has an art show at City Inn as part of the their excellent series showcasing northern artists.

Sleuth attended the launch of the event the following evening. “This is the first time I’ve ever made an exhibition of myself in the City Inn,” Gledhill told Sleuth. Sleuth can confirm Mr Gledhill is very well hung indeed. Go along and have a look yourself.

Absent mindedness
On the way to the Living Room last week, see earlier story here, Sleuth had bumped into Thom Hetherington in San Carlo. Thom runs Moorfield Media which puts on events such as the Restaurant Show and the Buy Art Fair in Manchester. On a recent Monday Thom announced to his lady that they were going to the big social event of the month. He got all black tied up, his lady put on her best cocktail dress. They arrived at Lancashire County Cricket Club in Old Trafford for the official launch of the Point, the vast new conference and banqueting facility of LCCC.

There was only a vast empty car park with all the lights turned off. Apparently Thom hadn’t read the invite properly for the opening of the Point, so had arrived on the date the RSVPs were supposed to be returned. Oops. “We had to continue the night,” said Thom, “we had a babysitter sorted out. There was only one place to go. Here. San Carlo. Nobody batted an eyelid.” Sleuth didn’t have the heart to inform him that his battiness was worse than he thought: if he’d read the invite properly then it had only specified ‘lounge suits’ not ‘black tie’. It happens.

More battiness
Sleuth likes scattiness. Sleuth is an all round fan of foolish impulse. He was lost in thought at a cashpoint recently in a big queue and when the cash came out of the hole in the wall, he said absently and gratefully, “thank you very much” to the machine. The people in the queue all gave him a very queer look.

On Thursday Sleuth was being interviewed by the lovely Elizabeth Alker for a Six Music show on the Beeb and she explained how, lost in planning the programme, she’d got off the London train the night before, picked up her handbag and left her suitcase on board. Didn’t realise for an hour. In the end she had to be driven to Longsight depot at midnight to retrieve it.

Readers from beyond the grave
The Confidential office has a bit of a thing going on about vampires. Georgina Hague and Kelly Ormesher need to be outted as blood obsessed groupies. They’ve even put a Twilight poster up in the kitchen at Confidential. Recently Ms Hague, one of our account handlers, on her twitter page vampirically mused that she hadn’t watched the True Blood film. A reader obliged instead.

Flying through the night on her bat wings, a twitter and Confidential fan named Deanna delivered said DVD to the office within 24 hours so she could indulge herself at home doing whatever vampire fans do. Twitter has some real value after all.

“I’m hungry,” said techie Tristan hearing this story, “I might tweet that I’ve not had a biriani from This’n’That yet - see if a reader brings one along.” Suffice to say he got it in the neck.

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