Sleuth 10/06/2011

Sleuth is a sideways glance at the city every week, it's the truth, but Sleuth's truth. We give £25 for every story/rumour and piece of absurdity you find for us to print. We ask for the money back if any legal action follows.

Lily Allen gets labelled

Lynda Moyo interviewed Lily Allen this week about her and her sis’s clothes line (click here). But were the Allen’s sisters togs too expensive someone asked? “If you’re comparing the prices to Primark then yes it’s considerably more expensive,” says Lily. “But the clothes are made from silk and really beautiful fabrics. It’s just ignorant. Well, not ignorant - ill informed.” So that folks is the reason for the price difference - quality of fabric. Wait a minute though, what’s this, see pic above right. A brief look at one of the tags proved otherwise. Inside a (£185) red jumpsuit the label read 100 per cent viscose with a polyester lining. Ach well, it’s just labels after all. 

Sleuth’s odd Carluccio's story of the week

So Kelly of Confidential nipped down to Carluccio’s. Kelly runs marathons, swims shark-infested waters, wrestles bears, and battles with utility people, she likes to keep herself fit. So when she spotted lemon tea on the Carluccio's menu for £1.80 her mind was made up. She wasn’t so sure when she received her drink. It consisted of boiled water and two slices of lemon. Not as she’d assumed some artfully infused mix of tea leaves and lemon. “Water. Lemons. That’s the way we do it,” said a member of staff. “Would a cup of boiled water be free?” asked the unimpressed Kelly. The reply was affirmative. In future Kelly’s going to take in her own lemon. Or mint. Or courgette. Give ‘em a squeeze into the free boiled water. Save £1.80.

Carlos Tevez and the two restaurants

Sleuth was amused by Carlos Tevez’s attack on Manchester (click here). The Argentine striker for City said in an interview in his own country that Manchester had just two restaurants and was very wet – and because he had no friends, he stayed at home all day waiting for his family to visit so he could make them barbecues with lots of Argentinian beef - that's him here imagining the ball is a fillet steak. 

Truth is, Tevez can’t cope with another culture, working class lad, poor education and all that. He’s like Gazza was in Italy, totally lost, unable to master the language. Or Liverpool striker Ian Rush, who said that being in Italy “was like living in another country”. Or Michael Owen, who allegedly used to drive to Madrid airport every morning to buy an English newspaper. Some people are just home boys. Sleuth is, however, going to offer the boy a guided tour when he gets back, show him the ropes, take him to a pub, show him some galleries.

Sleuth’s shock news of the week

Apparently a recent report has revealed that women in Manchester now have the lowest life expectancy in the country. Sleuth’s friend said: "It must be that Ryan Giggs wearing them out.”

Boardroom shake-up at Confidential

After news that opera-singer Placido Domingo is to advise FIFA’s Sept Blatter (pictured here) on football matters (click here), Confidential has decided on a massive shake-up with new people in key positions.

Eric Pickles will take over Health and Beauty. Ken Clarke will be the new agony aunt. Rosie Webster (Coronation Street) will now run News and Politics. Jade Goodey (deceased) will take charge of Arts and Culture. Kate Moss will sort out Food. Oliver Reed (deceased) will look after Booze. Lynda Moyo will take responsibility for Sport (when she finds out what it is). 

Sleuth’s puzzling news article of the week

Manchester business paper Insider ran this about Begbies Traynor, the insolvency company on Deansgate. ‘Executive chairman Ric Traynor this morning said the Manchester company's performance has stabilised after a "disappointing" year. Traynor said: "We have taken action to realign the business to current levels of activity, whilst maintaining our leading market position in UK SME insolvency and retaining the capacity to take advantage of any upturn in this market." 'Upturn'? It sort of made Sleuth’s head spin. So fewer insolvencies is ‘disappointing’? Sleuth wonders if undertakers felt the same when penicillin was invented. 

John Take Rylands That

Katie F one of our placement people went into John Rylands Library on Deansgate to review the temporary exhibitions. John Rylands was a charitable fella from the 1800s but wasn’t noted for partying – indeed he frowned upon it. While there Katie bumped into one Amanda Tucker who was giggling uncontrollably. Turned out she was the great, great, great granddaughter of Rylands and now lives far far away in the South.

She was giggling because she had known her ancestor had been famous in Manchester, but didn't know he had one its most beautiful buildings named after him. “So what are you here for?” asked Katie F. “The Take That concert,” Amanda replied. Sleuth’s pretty sure that John Rylands wouldn’t approve of the public dancing and open drinking taking place at Eastlands. He wouldn’t even have tapped his foot to ‘Back for Good’. Well maybe just once. Twice.

Sleuth’s blue picture of the week

No not like that. There was weird light at The Quays this weekend. So in the gallery below there are some pictures of Manchester gone azure. And some other ones of the lovely landscaping at MediaCityUK.

Sleuth’s most interesting facts THIS WEEK

All wines of the same colour are identical in flavour. 

Turkish Delight is part of a group of confectionery to include Syrian Excitement, Egyptian Elation and Grecian 2000.

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